Blog Post #18
_-_The_Nursery_Alice_(1890)_-_BL.jpg) |
| The White Rabbit from Alice in Wonderland: "I'm late!" |
To my
knowledge, there is no specific word in the English language for a person who
is usually two steps behind and, therefore, always hurrying, nor is there a
word for an extremely “put together” efficient person. For lack of better words on both counts, I’ll
refer to the former as a “Hurry-er,” and the latter as an “Efficienteer.” (I made up these words just for you.)
Some people
might think of a person who is always hurrying as efficient, but as I see it, that
couldn’t be further from the truth. A hurry-er, by nature, is anything but
efficient. In fact, hurry-ers are anything but hurry-ers. Moving quickly goes
against their nature. Hurry-ers are often
sloppy, redundant, and ineffectual. They only hurry because it has become the
last resort for their inaction. They hurry because they are always running
late. They procrastinate when action would put them “on top of the game.” Perhaps
they are just lazy. Personal interests
may be so absorbing to a hurry-er, that the he or she will let slide other
aspects of life until forced to face them, responding to all the pulls and tugs
nudging them from “the outside” (meaning the outside of their heads) only when
it becomes imperative that they do respond. While dawdling over an ant on the
windowsill, they ignore the rat rummaging through their kitchen. When the rat
makes for the door with the cheese, at once frenzied, they follow in a mad dash
to catch it, tripping on the piles of toys and junky things littering the house, barely
recognizing their frazzled image in the mirror hanging slightly askew as they pass, and finding they still have on their pajamas once they’re
out the door. They must return inside, searching every nook and cranny to find their car keys, before
they can even think of the pursuit. The rat has long escaped and the hurry-er hopelessly
left behind and in a muddle.
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| Illustration from "The Tale of Samuel Whiskers" by Beatrix Potter |
The hurry-er
lives in a constant state of disarray. A domino effect of woebegone activities
is set in motion by an initial choice that leads the hurry-er down the path to a
Never Never Land of never never getting caught up. Neglecting rudimentary
routines and necessities causes a pile-up of “have-tos” that soon form obstacles
to freedom. Just one little choice can lead to captivity for the hurry-er. For example, a
hurry-er I’ll call "Flakey" hears the
alarm go off at 6am. She pushes the snooze button. At 7:30, Flakey is still in
bed. The children got up while Flakey continued to push snooze. The kids were
hungry, and decided to prepare their own breakfast—which would be fine, except
they’re three and four years old. Cereal scatters all over the floors and
counters. Milk spills. Dishes break. The three-year-old falls off a chair
pushed up to the countertop in order to reach some forbidden cookies. Crying
ensues. Hearing this, Flakey rouses herself from the stupor she feels from
having overslept and hurries into the kitchen. She gets angry at the
four-year-old for the mess, while simultaneously scolding and comforting the
crying three-year-old who is covered in a sticky layer of crunchy crumbs. She bemoans her situation, wondering aloud, "Why me?" This
is just how the day begins. A series of similarly neglectful events pile up one on top of the other throughout the day until Flakey is at her wit’s end.
She might have enjoyed a different outcome had she chosen differently at
the onset.
To be fair, there
is a time and place for hurrying. Crossing a busy street, answering the call of
someone in need, and escaping a burning building are all good reasons to hurry.
It’s also a good idea to hurry when a pot of jam boils over, or a when a baby’s
diaper explodes.
Whereas a
hurry-er is constantly reacting to things, an efficient person, an Efficienteer,
is into prevention, and planning—focused on acting rather than reacting. An
efficienteer’s aim is to avoid muddles, not just respond to them. An efficienteer
prevents pots from boiling over. ("And
what about exploding diapers?” you ask smugly. Well, let’s face it—even though an exploding diaper
announces its arrival with a sound not unlike a recently unplugged drainpipe,
they are hard to anticipate—even for an efficienteer. Some things are outside
the realm of even the most efficient.)
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| An ounce of prevention... |
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| Think and plan ahead |
A true efficienteer has the ability to focus. To tune out the unnecessary. When multiple tasks are in need of attention, the efficienteer knows how to prioritize. If other tasks are called into play while focused on something truly important, the efficienteer is well equipped to assess whether or not the interruption is worthy of her time and immediate attention. Once assessed, the urgent squeaky wheel is handled with alacrity by the efficienteer in one of three ways : (1) she takes care of it quickly, (2) she relegates her attention to it at a time equal to its true importance, or, if she deems necessary, (3) she dismisses it altogether, returning to the needful and important with the same attention and resolve as before.
The
efficienteer plans for distractions. When a casual phone call interrupts the
efficienteer’s routine, the efficienteer has at the ready a list of mindless
tasks to perform that nevertheless need doing—such as ironing, sewing on a
button, or folding clothes—while talking via speakerphone.
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| "Woman Ironing" by Degas |
An
efficienteer’s motto might be “Semper Paratus,” since being always at the ready
is her forte. A hurry-er’s motto may
run more along the lines of “Videbimus,” meaning “We Shall See….”
I have functioned on both sides of
the hurry-er/efficienteer fence at different times in my life, although I must
admit, as the years have rolled by, my fence has increasingly leaned a little
more toward the efficienteer’s obsessive side. Prone to efficienteerism, I
would doubtless find a support beam to prop the leaning fence up. I think it’s
possible to switch off between being a hurry-er and an efficienteer depending
on circumstances, but I think, generally speaking, people gravitate toward one
or the other most of the time.
It’s a simple difference in viewpoint and energy. Surely
being an efficienteer isn’t always what it cracks up to be. For example, if
carried to an extreme, efficienteers may be accused of fanaticism, or
obsession. They must own the burden of this accusation because—feign to deny it—it
is more than likely true.
On the other hand, hurry-ers, being frequently caught
off-guard, may find themselves declared indifferent,
self-absorbed, or oblivious, when the real issue is
distraction. The hurry-er’s distractedness can be remedied by practice. Writing
lists, and following simple schedules are good places for a hurry-er to begin pushing their fence toward the efficient side, provided they are able to follow-through. Which is the whole problem in the first place.
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| Distractions |
As young wives, my sister and I both
read the book, “The Art of Homemaking” by Daryl Hoole (1962, Publishers Press). We admired her organizational expertise, the emphasis she put on creating
a home and reigning over it as a queen in her realm, (instead of being a common housewife), and the humorous way she made her points. We
discussed at length how we hoped to integrate her suggestions into our
households, and set to work doing so. It became a quest: organized shelves, de-junked,
uncluttered, and harmonious homes all underscored by a woman who understood that creating a home was a rare and beautiful art form worthy of creative and enterprising minds. These were the shining beacons we sought after.
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| "The Art of Homemaking" by Daryl Hoole |
My Uncle Albert used to say, “Wantin’
aint-a gettin’.” That applies to quests for organization and efficiency—especially
if you are of the hurry-er mindset. At least, it takes longer “to get” if you
are a hurry-er. (It sounds contradictory, but a distracted hurry-er reaches for
what they want while moving rapidly at a standstill in the opposite direction.)
One may incorporate many of the trappings of an organized household, but still
lack the mental efficiency required for upkeep. Again, it's about following through.
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| Page from "The Art of Homemaking" by Daryl Hoole |
This was not my problem, however. I
had the mental capacity, but I had to be creative with how to go about getting
what I was seeking, lacking space and funds to organize and create with flair the kind of home environment I envisioned. In its
humble way, my home reflected many of Mrs. Hoole’s suggestions and genius. Back
in those forward-looking days of budding enthusiasm for all things domestic, I
was oblivious to the development of an overly efficienteer mindset which she
described in her book, but I failed to recognize as a real possibility.
She told of a homemaker who went on a
date to the movies with her husband. No sooner had the woman sat down she
pulled out a dust cloth and began dusting the theater seating. She had become so obsessed with efficiency and
cleanliness she couldn’t relax and enjoy freedom from this responsibility. Karen
and I laughed at this story and I remember thinking that I could never relate
to that kind of behavior or mindset!
After all five of our children were sprouting into capable
individuals—our youngest child, just three at the time—my husband and I decided
it was time to host my entire side of the family for Thanksgiving dinner. A
feat we had never thought to undertake until that time. For the first time, we were in that blissful state called “Pride
of Home Ownership.” The house was still bare bones clean
and uncluttered, and we thought it time we christen it while relieving my dear
mother from the yearly bombardment of the hungry and thundering herds.
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| Painting by Norman Rockwell |
A little worried about how things would turn out, and to
insure everything was ready on time, I made a list for the week outlining the
dishes that could be made in advance, when to clean the house, and indicating
the timing of every task down to the moment we sat down to eat. Things did go
smoothly. Our children were enlisted to help with various responsibilities. I
even had time to relax in front of a cozy, toasty fireplace prior to our guests’
arrival. It was a turning point for me. I had walked the wobbly line between
hurrying and efficiency for many years. I saw that I could be efficient and
effective in a relaxed, unhurried way. That began my descent into obsession—into
learning that women who carry dust cloths into the movies may be more than just
a funny story. It just might be true—of me.
Now, over twenty years after that
fateful Thanksgiving Day when I had begun to master the fine art of efficiency,
I’m often accused, and rightly so, of clearing away the plates and cups of
those who aren’t finished using them. I like to wipe up spills as they happen—but
before they happen would suit me even
better.
When an efficienteer teeters on this
imbalanced line of unnecessary efficiency they cross into the gray matter of
superfluousity. In effect, they are no less effective than the hurry-er. Their efforts are counterproductive as they waste precious minutes they could be doing something of greater worth, instead of keeping on top of the knit picky, infinite demands of the mundane. Spinning wheels may appear to be working
hard, but if the vehicle they are attached to is up on a lift, of what use is
all that expenditure of energy? Their effort is in vain. So it is with a
superfluous efficienteer. (Try saying that fast three times in a row!)
Now, as I strive to resist my superfluous
efficienteer tendencies, I’ve learned some simple truths:
- You can hear the dishes and laundry snicker at you from their fresh places in the cupboard and closets if you inadvertently let them hear you say, “There! All done!”
- Organization is only as good as one’s memory.
- Wantin’ aint-a gettin’. Things worth having require effort, practice, and may eventually—if carried too far—need, to a degree, be unlearned.
- A freshly cleaned house sends out vibes to friends and family urging them to pay a random visit. Almost without fail, they are accompanied by small children who delight in playing in the sandbox, and when nature calls, scurry through the entire length of the house with a truckload of sand sifting through their clothing and shoes onto the carpets, only to deposit the remainder of the load onto the bathroom floor. This is the time for the penitent superfluous efficienteer to sit back and enjoy the visit. Leave the cleaning-up for when your wonderful guests have gone, and count your blessings that people still want to visit someone like you--who entertains with a dust cloth in her hand.
- An exploding diaper is an inevitability.
- Sometimes it’s nice to press snooze—come what may.
© September 20, 2014
9/24/14 - ADDENDUM: I've decided to add an addendum to this post in order to avoid confusion. I feel I should note that being an efficienteer doesn't necessarily mean that one has all one's ducks in a row all of the time. It doesn't mean one's house is always immaculate. The distinction is simply a matter of prioritizing time and funneling energy.
A reminder to all (myself included): The dust cloth will always be there waiting, and so will the dust. Loved ones, family, friends, children, grandchildren, parents, grandparents, will not....
As always, I thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my little blog. I feel honored you would do so.
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| Tempus Fugit |
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